Comments on: Release People Of Expectations, Let Them Be

By: Prathosh

Prathosh — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 10:22:38 +0000

Hi Avani Mehta
Good post
But Few points to add.
Expectation is By Product of Frusturation ..
and Ego is another Big obstacle on anything.
If these two are lessen,Relationship will Blossom and happiness
will be there.

By: Avani-Mehta

Avani-Mehta — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 23:56:10 +0000

Dileep, am glad you liked post and comments. I enjoyed conversing with everyone very much. Unconditional love is the key to peace and happiness isn’t it?

By: Dileep

Dileep — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 20:44:13 +0000

Great post and interesting comments..
Unconditional love of our family, friends, neighbors and the whole world makes everyone’s life more peaceful and happy.

By: Avani-Mehta

Avani-Mehta — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 01:03:56 +0000

Paul, that’s true. We expect those who have kept our trust intact in past to do that in future as well. But past is no guarantee for future – either ways.

By: Avani-Mehta

Avani-Mehta — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 01:02:48 +0000

Argument 1, this is interesting. Basically means expect least to not get hurt and find bonuses everywhere.

By: Avani-Mehta

Avani-Mehta — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 01:00:50 +0000

Jannie, that makes sense. We want to ensure we will be safe with others. Hence we test them little by little – just to be sure.

By: Avani-Mehta

Avani-Mehta — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 00:59:18 +0000

Tom, that reminded me of my childhood. I used to argue a lot about this – that if you don’t appreciate, you don’t get to criticize.

By: Paul Maurice Martin

Paul Maurice Martin — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 23:04:30 +0000

“When we love someone and respect that person a lot, we start thinking highly of them. We create this image of them in our minds which is just perfect.”

I’ve also found this to be a major factor in how we can be hurt more by people close to us than others. Another factor is that people close to us can violate our trust more profoundly because we’ve placed more trust in them and have a history with them of that trust working out.

By: Argument 1

Argument 1 — Sun, 30 Aug 2009 19:07:02 +0000

Now I never thought I will pull wikipedia but have a look read and think again, cause there are neither wrongs nor rights but the relative direction of life.

In the case of uncertainty, expectation is what is considered the most likely to happen.

In Emotion and Adaptation (Oxford University Press, 1991), Richard Lazarus asserts that people become accustomed to positive or negative life experiences which lead to favorable or unfavorable expectations with regard to present and near-future circumstances. Lazarus notes the widely accepted, philosophical principle that “happiness depends on the background psychological status of the person — that is, the overall pattern of expectations and existential mood — and cannot be well predicted without reference to” one’s expectations [emphasis added].
Also with regard to happiness or unhappiness, Lazarus notes that “people whose objective conditions of life are those of hardship and deprivation often make a positive assessment of their well-being,” while “people who are objectively well off… often make a negative assessment of their well-being.” Lazarus argues that “the most sensible explanation of this apparent paradox is that people… develop favorable or unfavorable expectations” that guide such assessments.

Should I objectively guide my expectations towards my friends,relatives and other beings.Even if not should I tame my mind to objectively think for expectations and divulge only what I disguise or perceive.

To simply not expect is also splitting and keeping a thought to myself for me and hence I share.

I share a laugh, a thought , a word , a poem and the light I see, I am not with comfort of certainty but a resolve that the same certainty of happiness will follow and take course and this randomness of expectation is also certainty.Just as my friends child never laughs as I clap twice but always laughs when I hold him high in the air and catch him he always laugh.

By: Jannie Funster

Jannie Funster — Sat, 29 Aug 2009 13:18:59 +0000

I have been reflecting on this more. And recall in Tolle's book "The Power Of Now," he mentions we tend to "pick at" our nearest and dearest, and always lose the honeymoon glow but REAL love steps in for the long-haul. Maybe we test our nearest and dearest and know they will still be there for us. So this is normal for humans. .-= Jannie Funster´s awesome post ..Yes, Kids Do Say The Darndest Things =-.