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How To Create Lasting Relationships
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My great grandfather’s brother’s great grandson is considered to be in close relation to me; he & I are considered to be part of close family.
As I stroll through my mom’s home town (where she grew up), everyone knows me as so and so’s daughter/grand daughter/niece/… And because I am so and so’s daughter/grand daughter/niece/…, I am the same for entire town (based on whom they know and relate to). We might be meeting for the first time, but a simple introduction is enough to create a bonding – one in which you would be happy for all the happiness the other gets and would step ahead to be of help in times of sorrow.
I am fascinated by kind of relationship my elders have created. Fascinated and puzzled … over how is this possible. How can someone create this kind of lasting relationship which survives through generations – not just your lifetime but lifetimes of generations after you.
How To Create Lasting Relationships
Here are 10 tips I got on creating lifetime relationships -
1. There is only one way to have such a long lasting relationship – keep the relationship.
2. Show up in times of happiness and sadness.
3. Stay in touch. And help the other person stay in touch.
4. It doesn’t matter how much time has gone by in between, once related, you are related forever. Don’t ever question whether the relationship or friendship exists. It’s there – it’s for you to keep or not keep.
5. Take interest in their life. Ask questions and remember answers. Keep a note if you are forgetful kind. If you know the last update you recieved, you will be comfortable with them and conversation will flow easily.
6. People are interested in you as well. So share your life updates and life stories.
7. When you look at lifetime of relationship, you are bound to fight and hurt each other. Forgive, forget and love back.
8. Be thoughtful. A small thoughtful act goes a long way.
9. Be of use to someone, be helpful.
10. Every call counts. Don’t hesitate, call your people – even if you talk for just a minute.
Bonus. If you forget all ten points mentioned above, don’t forget this one – love and keep loving. Love transcends all boundaries – yours, theirs and others. Love your people and allow them to love you back. You can never go wrong with love because love makes every wrong right.
How do you create lasting relationships? What are your tips on creating lifetime relationships?
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Honesty towards oneself and others one of the best tip to continue relationships.
HOBO(nickname)´s last blog post..Saturday-The 14th-Happy Valentine’s Day
In my experience the best way to create lasting relationships, is to completely remove them out of the picture. In other words, stay so focused and centered within, that nobody outside influences how you feel. When you find your center within yourself, when you are aligned with that center of yourself so keen, you will know exactly how to get feeling good again in any situation, and when you stay true to your feelings… then you are consciously creating a reality of joy, peace, and happiness.
Through mastering this technique, you will start to notice how people are drawn to you, how they feel uplifted just by being in your presence, how you seem to carry this energy of love with you everywhere you go. The relationships outside yourself, will become a reflection of what is within yourself.
Most people see this as being selfish and self-centered and they are right, it’s the most loving centerness one can find because that love within yourself, that happiness, that feeling good, that peace of mind… is reflected outward too. That is perhaps the most loving thing you could for your relationships (not to mention everyone else around you in your daily life).
Be grateful for your feelings. Honor them and respect them as number one, make them your number one focus. When feeling good is your objective, then you allow yourself to project that feeling onto others without trying.
Feelings from within are not effected by the environment around us, when this is recognized, then we have no need for people outside us to change in order for us to feel good. Feeling good comes from within and when we’re not feeling good, it’s because our perspective is different then that of our ‘within Source’. Feelings are the language of ‘the soul’ and we can be aligned with who we really are by paying close attention to how we feel and that is truly how relationships last a lifetime.
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I’m not very good at keeping in touch with relatives. When I was young, I have always felt that my performance was compared to some of my cousins. As we grew up, we drifted apart. Based on our current interests, I’m not even sure that we’ll have much to talk on as well. Still, I agree that it will be nice to keep family relationships going. We may not connect everyday but it’ll be fun to catch up every once in a while.
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Hi Avani – I was smiling as I read your opening. I was raised in a small town and that’s how we were labeled, as our parents children. Like you said, it created an instant bond.
I love your ten points. I feel it very important for us to cultivate our friendships/relationships. It’s when we stop communicating the bond starts to break.
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So true about fights: they’re not fun, but they’re not the end, either. My best friend and I have had a couple of crazy fights, but we both know that we’d be there for each other whenever needed.
One thing that has helped us is to let the other person grow and change. Most of our fights came when one of us was ready to change and the other didn’t want to let go of the past.
Hi Avani,
You are so right about the importance of keeping in touch.
I’m bad at although I have a small family and we only tend to meet at weddings(few and far apart), and funerals. We always exchange phone numbers and e-mail addresses and this is where it begins and ends.
I’ve printed your post and am going to make a concious effort to give everyone a call.
Thanks.
Hi, Avani
Do you know? As I was reading the list, it seemed to me that all the points boiled down into one: keep doing your relationship. It’s just not one “done and forget” event.
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Hi! I am probably the worst at keeping up with relatives and friends, my wife on the other hand is fabulous! A list worth printing out!
“Love and keep loving. Love transcends all boundaries – yours, theirs and others” Very powerful!
Dear Avani,
To create a lasting relationship, one needs to understand relationship from “Other Person’s Point of View”. When we are able to see relationships from a higher point, we have a greater understanding of ourselves and our ability to give space to all.
Relationships are vital as they bring lessons for personal growth. All relationships need not stay connected forever, cause what makes them stay connected is Only LOVE; and when Love is missing, the connection is only a pretense.
We all need to accelerate our potential to Love All and yet be Detached.
Love and Light,
Rigved Korgaonkar
One-on-One Personal Coach for Power Performance
http://rigvedkorgaonkar.wordpress.com/rigved-korgaonkar-one-on-one-personal-coach/
Rigved Korgaonkar´s last blog post..Different Dreams – An access to the deterministic source of what we Dream!!:)